Have You Ever Wondered…. Where Would I Be…

Have you ever wondered, where would I be if I followed that path instead of this path?  What would I be doing if I didn’t start “that” when I was younger?  Would I be the same person I am now?

I made a lot of decisions when I was younger that I am feeling the consequences of them now. I am 42 years old and sometimes wonder at the questions above.

Question one. Where would I be if I followed a different path. I had the opportunity to go and stay with my father in Washington state when I was 18 years old. I was seeing this boy and was in love with him. I chose to stay right where I was. I ended up marrying him. We had a beautiful daughter who is now 14. Her father and I divorced when she was four.

Question two. What would I be doing if I didn’t start “that” when I was younger. To be perfectly honest. I have no idea. The “that” I am speaking of is, taking a job that I hated because I needed the money. I was a college student. I got an Associates Degree in Office Management. I wanted to work in an office. Instead, I ended up working in Customer Service. One thing I suggest?  Unless that’s the field you really want?  Do not do it. It is a black hole on your resume that you may never crawl out out. I wasn’t entirely motivated to find out what I wanted to be when I got older. I had a boyfriend that I knew I was going to marry. Why would I need to know what I wanted to be?

Question three. Would I be the same person I am today?  I would like to think so. I am an independent woman that I hope my daughter feels that she can look up to. After my divorce, I went back to school and got my Bachelors Degree in Organizational Management.

With that “Black Hole” on my resume?  I am still in an Entry Level position that I am miserable in. I feel that I am being stifled and not using my full potential. I encourage my daughter to follow her dreams all the time. So, why shouldn’t I do the same?  It’s never too late, right?

I am now in the process of following my new found dreams and am starting a Freelance career. I’m starting it to move closer to where my daughter will be going to High School. Once she graduates, I’ll be hitting the road, (Providing a man doesn’t come in and snatch up this catch first!) and taking my mobile career with me. I’ll be on the search to find my new home. Wherever the road takes me.

So, to answer the questions…  I would take the same path. Divorced or not, my daughter is my life. Her father is an excellent one. I can’t imagine another path being any better.  If I didn’t do “that” when I was younger? Was motivated by my own standards, if not by anyone else?  I would never have put in that application. It’s the lines of, I wish I knew then what I know now. I love to read. I am now writing my own book and editing for others. Would I be the same person?  Yes.  I am stubborn, opinionated and have a small issue with authority. I was like that then and nothing has changed. So, wish me luck in my new career path as I look to moving forward.

Ask yourself the same questions. Did you like what you heard?


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